CROSSROADS TO SOMEWHERE: Whom Can You Trust These Days?

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By W.T. WIMPY HIROTO
(First published in
The Rafu Shimpo on May 11, 2011.)

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Bulletin: Crossroads to Somewhere is on the cusp of making a momentous announcement, but a source close to the situation claims there is a major disagreement concerning the agreement. Since he/she is not authorized to speak on the matter the (dis)agreement remains in limbo. Another person directly involved in the negotiations revealed the rift is really not that major and that a compromise was imminent if all parties involved returned to the negotiation table free of bias and lawyers. This observer also asked for anonymity since he is a prejudiced barrister who is also not authorized to say anything.

The Birthers have apparently found a new mantra: Doubters. Bin Laden is not dead. Ron Paul really doesn’t want to legalize drugs. President Obama just pretends to be left-handed and shouldn’t speak at a Catholic university. Arab Spring is a CIA code word meaning Muslim soap. (And it’s really not significant, but I can’t help but wonder if there are Japanese Americans among them?)

Sometimes I even surprise myself with this penchant I have for seeing into the future. Naw, none of that crystal gazer stuff:  more of the common garden variety like foreseeing the crash of the ’11 Lakers, the Purple and Gold going purple and fold (where did all those banners and flags go?); Tiger Woods flubbing his quest to surpass Jack Nicklaus; Andrew Bynum starring in a circus remake of the movie classic “It’s a Wonderful Life,” re-titled “Bynum and Bailey.”

“Geronimo — EKIA” was the coded message President Obama and his security staff were anxiously waiting to hear the evening of May 1. The relief and euphoria that followed also had another result: the din of protest that arose from some who felt the use of the Apache warrior’s name was demeaned and dishonored. (His real name was “Guyaale,” “the Yawner.” Not something you would expect paratroopers to shout as they leapt from planes over enemy territory in WWII.) Damn. You’d think educated people would have something better to complain about. As one of the most respected (sic) leaders of the mid-1880s Indian wars, he holds the distinction of being the last warrior chief to fight the United States in war. Karl Jacoby, a history professor at Brown University, writes that Guyaale’s great-grandson, Joseph Geronimo, feels that using the name to kill Bin Laden was a “slap in the face” to all ancestors.

As a latter-day Apache in cords and crew cut, in the same Arizona desert territory where the chieftain reigned, CR2S also succumbed to U.S. might at an outpost called Poston some 56 years later. If someone in the CIA decided to use the code name to signal success in one of the greatest military achievements ever, I say “Banzai!” Doesn’t mean gazootie as I’ve never shot a firearm in anger. But you know, neither did John Wayne. In my exciting time “O.D.” meant (wearing) olive drab.

Someday soon I may get into all kinds of (perception) trouble due to the habit of a Nip shooting from the hip/lip. Cest la vie and all that jazz. Take it from an aging, non-violent Jappo, if the butt doesn’t start objecting to an elongated session at the keyboard, the juices begin to roil, the mind starts to boil and it becomes CR2S’s personal “Geronimo” time. I imagine writing a column is somewhat like jumping out of the belly of a low-flying transport plane. You have no idea where you’re landing, how, in what condition and what the eventual reception will be.

In case you hadn’t noticed, I have this thing against stupidity. So I wind up criticizing athletes, celebrities, personalities and wannabes. The latest commentary is their ill-advised use of Twitter and Facebook. When they can’t put six words together that make any sense to begin with, you can imagine the mess they make stroking out 140 characters. ??? a mess!!!

Questions that require an answer: What is a hairshirt? Prime Minister Naoto Kan will forfeit his monthly salary ($20,200) until Japan’s nuclear crisis is over. Doesn’t that mean he won’t draw a paycheck forever? And isn’t that kind of a meager salary? What with all of the natural (?) disasters visiting the world, how can anyone breathing deny global warming? Should I think about buying a new car? All of a sudden I realized my current Camry is 10 years old. An eternity for someone who leased yearly when gainfully employed. (But it has only 37,000 miles of wear, so why be concerned about appearance?)

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You will connect with a part of your past. There is still a kind of electrical charge when you touch on this part of your history. [Am not influenced one whit by something as nebulous as astronomy. But …]

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W.T. Wimpy Hiroto can be reached by email. Opinions expressed in this column are not necessarily those of The Rafu Shimpo.

 

 

 

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