(First published in The Rafu Shimpo on June 8, 2011.)


[I guess being chastised is better than being physically attacked. Or screwed. Especially when it doesn’t really hurt anything except one’s narcissism and vanity. Two traits you can do without anyway.]

The root cause for today’s consternation and humility is a lengthy (unsigned) handwritten letter that took “Crossroads to Somewhere” to task; a nice way to say “taken to the woodshed,” referencing the 05/25/11 column, “Where Were You at 6 p.m. Saturday?” Apocalypse awaits.

“ ‘Contacting loved ones … was an immediate thought,’ you wrote in regards what to do before the world came to an end,” the obviously irked writer repeated to freshen my memory.

“Did it not ever cross your supposedly educated [USC] mind that if the world came to an end on a certain date that EVERYONE would be deceased? That means, dear CR to S, that no one would be alive to read your heartfelt email or snail-mail entreaties. You’d be wasting your time writing lovely messages to DEAD people!” he (and I’m pretty sure it’s a male) reminds. And continues:

“ ‘(And then) I made my way to the kitchen and prepared my last supper in case there was a time delay …’  you write, coming to the whimsical  conclusion, ‘If someone was going to conduct an autopsy … there would have to be rice in my belly.’”

The complainer herein allows a begrudging compliment or two regarding my writing style and play on words,  but again with emphasis, reminds the illogic of anyone being around to conduct an autopsy when everyone is kaput! And as a capper to the dissection of the column, he adds that “the rambling utterances of your emailer Yas S., who decries biblical hearsay and myth, should be aware there are no direct quotes by Jesus or His Father (in the Holy Bible.)”

Okay. Next?

“Your concluding item regarding senior acronyms was cute, especially the addition to the Can’t Get Up (CGU) listing where you made it CGIU, implanting a provocative “I” for “it.” I would guess it was a typically crude creation of your own shortcoming.”

Touche! And rather than retaliate, I think I will let sleeping canines rest in peace (for now). But, shoot, a couple of words of defense shouldn’t be out of place:

Writing final thoughts to a loved one, alive or dead, is not that unusual, at least in my world. I see no harm in it though some may logically question the sanity or worth of such a choice.  And as far as someone doing an autopsy when all is lost? I think it’s rather quaint. Whatever else, the existence of a reader who decides to take the time to criticize and take me to task is a welcome change of pace. Too many paeans can be misleading, leading to a whole world of imagined grandeur. But they are welcome, don’t get me wrong, like salt and sugar and fat. A critical critique every now and again is also good to rein in a bloated ego.

CR2S is waiting for a politician contemplating retirement to announce they are going to spend more time fooling around but not with the family.

Corey Nakatani has taken his tack elsewhere, giving up on the SoCal racing circuit.

“Opprobrium” means infamy, ignominy. I can’t seem to find a place in column to use the word, so there it is, all by itself. Useless.

“Probity” is another. It means honesty and virtue. No wonder.

Kevin Takumi is Channel 4’s news chopper pilot and reporter.

“Sometimes I wonder why I spend the lonely nights, dreaming of a song …” — When songs were memorable, lyrics rhapsodic and a personal message within …

Among the millions watching the NBA finals; something I haven’t done in a while. As a captive onlooker, it’s Nothing But Ads if you ask me. With remote in hand I can catch breaking news during a 90-second time-out and a half-inning of a dull baseball game during a full.

CR2S wonders why (but knows) every mention of seniors is described as sick, ailing, needy, disabled, impoverished, destitute. Politicians grovel for votes and AARP seeks more membership clout, but you know something? The majority of elderly are comfortably well off, pleased with Medicare and the accompanying advantages. Like the rich rich, seniors shouldn’t be the beneficiary of so much free largesse.

“It hurts less when you put things into words.” —Carrie Fisher.


W.T. Wimpy Hiroto can be reached at [email protected] Opinions expressed in this column are not necessarily those of The Rafu Shimpo.





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